G for Greetings!!

GHonestly speaking, I was so busy since morning today that I never got time enough to think what I would write for letter ‘G’ in A to Z challenge.

It was my daughter’s birthday… the twelfth (OMG how time flies…she was born only yesterday!) and she had made a long list of what she wanted for dinner today and lunch and how she wanted to take her friends out for a birthday treat and a hundred other things !! Phew!! I completed everything to her satisfaction and she has slept off with a happy face!

I remember celebrating her first birthday….it was more for our happiness than hers! She was happy to have her feed and sleep at her regular time. We had to do everything…the cake cutting, the photographs etc according to her sleep timings and her un-cranky timings! Once she was photographed to our hearts content, she slept and the party for adults carried on.

But today she turned twelve….only a year now that she will turn thirteen….A TEEN!! Now I have the difficult task of explaining to her about birds and bees, of mood swings, of developing body, of hormones, of being aware of bad men and their thought process, of PMS…of hundred things which might make her check her carefree childlike attitude, which might scare her of the big bad world, which might make her little apprehensive…..which will make her little guarded…little grown up.

I wish I could keep her childlike and innocent for few more years…to let her be free and bear her worries all by myself but the time won’t stop for me to relish her childhood any more. It is better I let her know what growing up entails.

She is one curious girl and wants to know everything as soon as possible…wants to wear my shoes, wants to do bigger chores in kitchen, wants me to let her be alone at home without a chaperone…she says she is a big girl now and not scared of anybody! But darling girl, how do I explain that I am !! I am scared of everybody and everything now that I have been a big girl since many years now. I am scared for her well-being and safety.

birthday goodies at homeYes! But today is her day and I don’t want to cloud it with my fears. So Greetings!! my little baby on turning twelve. Wish you a very Happy Birthday ! May all your dreams come true and you grow up in a calm, safe happy world! May God bless you!! Love you tonnes sweetheart!

Worries of a preteen’s mom….

Yes, I am a worried preteen’s mom. I know my daughter is growing up and very fast indeed(her clothes are just not keeping up!!) and I am just not prepared for it. I want the years to stop rolling by and let my baby stay a little girl for bit longer….

She is still so carefree and so innocent. Though the need of the times demands that I explain to her about the good and the bad touch but it breaks my heart to see the scared expression on her face…

Dealing with the Hannah Montana craze of hers is easier as long as it ends with all her stuff imprinted with the image of teenage pop star but what about the ideas of having a boyfriend at such tender age. I hope she doesn’t get influenced by such ideas….. What if she rebels?

Ah! and now I will have to prepare her mentally for the stressful days every month for the rest of her life… I remember my initial days… I felt lost, scared, punished, hateful, angry, irritated, agitated and dreaded the next month. I remember the sudden restrictions, consciousness and the smirking knowing looks that the teenaged male classmates darted at the girls. Oh! how I despised being a thirteen year old with so many things to deal with…. studies, physical and emotional changes and the unsuccessful attempts to get appreciation in whatever I did!!  Yes, I am worried for her because I do not know whether  I would be able to ease off her pain, anxiety and be her rock… I just wish she wouldn’t suffer.

It’s a bad, bad world out there and even if she does listen to all the “Dos and Don’ts” that I tell her yet there are wolves lurking on every turn… It is so disturbing mentally and emotionally to hear wayward comments mouthed by illiterate, rowdy and perverted men while walking down a street. No, O Lord! please let her not have any bad experience…… I wish I could protect her from all bad things in this world… I wish the world were a better place to let our daughters venture freely into…

Yes, I am a worried mom of a preteen daughter and this is again going to last forever….at least till she is strong enough to deal with her own fears, insecurities and her own worries….